NaruSaku – Suicide part 2: The healing of mind and body.

Naruto was sitting on the hospital roof engulfed in a crude hospital blanket, listening to the sounds of Konoha after dark. The village was quiet this time of night, the thin layer of snow seemed to block out every sound, only the silent footsteps of ninjas returning from missions could be heard every now and then.

Sakura had left a few hours ago, pretty much chased out by the fifth Hokage, she had insisted that Naruto needed rest. Both Naruto and Sakura had been sad that they had to part ways just a few hours after they had confessed their love for each other, but on the other hand Naruto knew that he needed to be alone so that he could figure out how to deal with the conflicting feelings inside him.
It was strange, he felt happy, confused, relieved and terrified all at the same time. He was exhilarated by the fact that Sakura was finally shining the same feelings of love onto him, that he had shun onto her for so long. And he was relieved that he would finally have someone to share his secret and burdens with. But could he really place Sakura in such danger, could he live with himself if he once again lost control, if she got hurt because of him?

Naruto looked into the clear night sky, being with Sakura that afternoon had been perfect, they had spend their time just enjoying each other’s company, and making out of course. Even in the cold snowy night Naruto felt warm as he remembered the feeling of Sakuras moist lips pressing against his own, it had felt incredible and Naruto couldn’t wait to be back with her again, to feel her body against his, and breathe in the scent of her hair.
Naruto sighed, was he really entitled a feeling as pure and beautiful as love? Would it not have been better if he had died alone in the forest as he had planned?

Narutos pondering soon came to an end as a familiar voice approached from behind:
“I heard you woke up.” Sasuke said as he sat down next to Naruto.
“I guess.” Naruto said to his rival and friend. “I thought you were still away on that secret mission for Tzunade-sama.”
“I got back a few hours ago, the mission was a success of course. I just finished with the paperwork, heard what happened to you, and came to see if you were alright. So… how are you holding up?”
“Okay I guess. The doctor says I am going to make a full recovery.”
“Well you do have a habit of bouncing back from mortal injuries. Now you just need my skills and maybe you would actually have a shot at becoming a jounin like me one day.”
Naruto sighed, he wasn’t in the mood for Sasukes endless taunts about how he had become a jounin already and Naruto was still just a chunin.

Sasuke looked at Naruto with real concern, Naruto never passed out on an opportunity to yell about being far superior to Sasuke in any way.
“I heard what happened.” Sasuke said, pausing for a while to look at the snow “How on earth could you do something like that? I mean what the hell went through your mind?”
Naruto didn’t answer, he had been expecting that question. He knew Sasuke would hate him for hurting Sakura, they had never been a pair romantically speaking  but sasuke loved Sakura like a sister, and nothing Naruto could say would make Sasuke understand that he had never meant to hurt her, or how the fact that he had hurt her was tearing his soul apart. Perhaps it was for the best, if Sasuke thought he was a danger to Sakura, then he would not be sad if he disappeared.
“How do you think the rest of us would feel if you had died?”
Naruto blinked, he had not been expecting that.
“I left a note.” Naruto said apologizing, feeling pathetic even as he spoke.
“A note? You mean the obviously fake running away note you left behind? Hah, like that would fool anyone.”
“S-sorry.” Naruto said with a weak voice.
“Don’t apologize to me, you git. You should be apologizing to Kakashi-sensei, he didn’t give up his life for us just so we could throw away ours. “

They sat in silence for a bit, each of them thinking of what to say next.
“Do you know who brought me back?” Naruto asked after a while, moving the subject away from their late sensei.
“Nah, but I heard that the trap you set up for… you know, was pretty much rubbish. That’s properly why you are still breathing.”
“Really? I thought I had set it all up perfectly.”
“No I hear that the shurikens or kunais you had set up behind you, never even got close to making their target.”
“hmm, I see.“
“And what is that rumor I hear floating around? Any truth to it?”
“What do you mean?” Naruto said fearing that his secret had been figured out by to others than Sakura.
“Don’t play dumb with me, half of Konoha is talking about how you and Sakura have finally gotten together.”
“Oh” Naruto said relieved, “Yeah I guess that is true.”
“About time if you ask me, you two have had the hots for each other for years, not that she didn’t try to hide it, but I saw right through her.” He said activating his sharigan, making Naruto laugh for the first time in days.

“So what about you?” Naruto said for the first time taking a good look at his friend. “You look really pale, was the mission that though?”
“It wasn’t easy but I made it through all right, don’t worry about me, the paperwork just got me down, you just concentrate on getting well okay?”
Naruto nodded slowly, he wasn’t convinced that Sasuke was being completely honest but he didn’t press the subject as Sasuke continued. “Anyway, I have to go, I’ve got a debriefing with the Hokage, Ill check back in with you tomorrow okay?”
“Okay” Naruto said as Sasuke headed for the stairs.

The hospital was pretty much empty this time of night so Sasuke didn’t meet anyone till he staggered into the hospital entrance hall breathing heavily.
“I am pretty sure Hokage-sama told you not to leave your bed till sometime next week.” Shikamaru said as he strolled towards Sasuske.
“I just went to… talk to Naruto.” Sasuke panted his face covered in sweat.
“You shouldn’t have gone up there, you know what will happen if the wounds opens again.”
“I… I know. I just… I had to talk… to him.” Shikamaru quickly grabbed a hold of Sasuke as his legs started to cave in. He had used up all his strength just keeping up a façade while talking to Naruto, and the walk down the stairs had completely drained him of energy.
“There we go.” Shikamaru said as he pulled Sasuske back on his feet. “Let’s get you back to your room before one of the docs return to an empty room.”

They walked in silence, Shikamaru halfway carrying Sasuke as they made their way to a small room in the other end of the hospital where Sasuke had been admitted. Shikamaru gently lowered him face down onto the bed.
“I’ll just check if the some of the wounds have opened okay? So don’t freak out when I start taking off your shirt.”
Sasuke didn’t complain, perhaps he was too exhausted to do so even if he wanted to. So Shikamaru met no resistance as he pulled off Sasukes shirt, revealing his completely bandaged back. Shikamaru went over his entire back with his hands, gently touching the wounds under the bandages. He was no medical ninja but despite his young age he had already seen his fair share of wounded comrades, but that was the prize to pay for being one of the most gifted team leaders in Konoha.
“Well it doesn’t look like anything is bleeding anymore so that’s good, but you need to stay in bed Sasuke, or this stuff will never heal. “ Sasuke didn’t answer, Shikamaru shook his head, why would Naruto and Sasuke never think before they acted? “Did you at least tell him what happened?”
“I couldn’t,” Sasuke said, speaking for the first time since Shikamaru had helped him to his feet, his breathing was less forced now that he was lying down and he could talk without having to pause every 2 seconds. “He is already feeling guilty for what happened to Sakura, who knows how he would react if he knew I was in this condition because of him. I can’t afford to lose him Shikamaru, without Naruto I wouldn’t know what to do with myself.”
Shikamaru spotted a single tear dragging a trail down Sasukes cheek before he turned his head away from his wounded comrade. Shikamaru he had been at the gate when Sasukes had appeared carrying a half dead Naruto, he had looked like a pincushion with at least 14 kunais still deeply buried in his back, his clothe had been torn and used for makeshift bandages that had been used to stop Narutos bleeding, causing Sasuke to almost loose a leg to a nasty case of frostbite. Sasuke had been as close to death as Naruto was when they got them to the hospital, the blood loss and a terrible low body temperature had caused the doctors to send both Sasuke and Naruto directly to the emergency room.
It was a funny thing that the two people in all of Konoha who would go through fire and flames just to help each other, would most likely never confess how important their friendship was to them.
“What a drag.” Shikamaru said as he left to look for a doctor.